(Please
do not confuse our organization with the independent film project
that goes by the name "Radio Free Babylon." We are
in no way associated with that low-budget and heretofore unfinished
movie. This name was registered to us in 2000 and incorporated
in Missouri that same year. If the film project known as "Radio Free Babylon" ever gets released, we will sue its creators
and distributors for defamation. If there was a movie released
called "Xerox," don't you think the Xerox corporation
would have something to say about that? We rest our case.)
PRIVACY
STATEMENT
HEADACHES
WILL ENSUE AND WE ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THEM
We
used this heinous font color to keep you awake while you read
this incredibly boring stuff. If you have a headcahe when you're
done reading it, that's your own fault.
Radio Free Babylon™, LLC PRIVACY POLICY
(Last Updated June 5, 2011)
Radio Free Babylon™ ("Radio Free Babylon™," "we," "us" or "our")
operates a Web site located at www.radiofreebabylon.com (the "Site")
from which users can gather information concerning news and services
provided by Radio Free Babylon™ (the "Radio Free Babylon™ Services").
This Radio Free Babylon™ Privacy Policy ("Privacy Policy")
covers our treatment of personally identifiable information that
we collect when you access the Site and when you use the Radio Free Babylon™ Services. Are you asleep yet?
Information
Collection and Use
Radio Free Babylon™ receives a variety of "personally identifiable
information."
Radio Free Babylon™ also asks that you provide your email address on the "contact
us" section of the Site so that we are able to respond to
your question(s) by email. You have the option of also providing
information regarding your name, demographics (such as your state
and country of residency), operating system, browser, Internet
service provider ("ISP"), connection type and email program
that you are using. If you are so inclined, you may also tell us
how much money you make, where you keep the spare key to your house,
and what hours of the day are best to find said house vacant.
Radio Free Babylon™ also automatically receives and records information
on our server logs from your browser, including your IP Address
and the page you requested. Your IP address is not linked to your
email address or Radio Free Babylon™. But we like to keep that stuff
handy, just in case you have been co-pted by some secret government
agency and are working on their behalf to try to hack our server.
Radio Free Babylon™ uses your email address for the following purposes:
To
contact you about the Radio Free Babylon™ Services or the Site.
Yeah right. Like that's gonna happen.
To
notify you when you receive a Radio Free Babylon™ email message.
To
communicate with you concerning problems or malfunctions you report.
Maybe.
Information
Sharing and Disclosure
Radio Free Babylon™ will not sell or rent your email address, name, mailing
address, or other supplied information to anyone. Radio Free Babylon™
will not share your email address, first or last name, mailing
address, or other received information to anyone, except as stated
below:
We
may disclose personally identifiable information about you as legally
required in order for us to respond to subpoenas, court orders,
or other legal processes. So like, if the law is after you and
they make us rat you out, we will do everything we can to try to
keep you hidden, but if it comes down to "Tell us his/her
email addressor you're going to jail," well, what would you
do? So it might be wise to keep a few email addresses, and a few
disguises in the trunk of your car.
Changes
to This Privacy Policy
Radio Free Babylon™ may amend this Privacy Policy from time to time. If
we make any substantial changes in the way we use your personal
information, we will notify you by posting a prominent announcement
on the Site. Something big and ugly that you can't miss. Like flashing
neon green font or something.
Questions
or Suggestions
If
you have any questions, comments, criticisms, complaints, or suggestions,
send an email to webmaster@radiofreebabylon.com. We will likely
ignore them. It's just better that way. You let your skin get too
thin out here on the web and they will rip you to shreds.
IP
Addresses
When
your Web browser or email application requests a Web page from
another computer on the Internet, it automatically gives that computer
the address where the requested information should be sent. This
is called your computer's "IP address." (IP stands for "Internet
protocol.") For most users accessing the Internet from a dial-up
ISP, the IP address may be different every time you log on.
Information
Collection and Use Practices
Radio Free Babylon™ receives your IP address each time you view a Web
page from the Site. Your IP address is not linked to your email
address or any other personally identifiable information. But it's
still sort of creepy, isn't it? Do you feel watched?
Your
IP address may be used for various purposes, including:
To
diagnose service or technology problems reported by you that are
associated with your IP address. And in most cases, we will tell
you something like, "Shut your machine off and then turn it
back on again." This is a time-honored tech trick, and is
sometimes referred to as "logic lock power refresh."
To
estimate the total number of users visiting the Site from specific
locales, countries or regions of the world. That way we can better
understand why, say, the jobs page is so popular in Indonesia while
the broadcast page is a huge hit in Wyoming.
Log
Files
When
a Web page on the Site is requested, that request (including the
date and time) is logged on our servers with information including
the IP address of the computer that requested the page. Is that
cool or what? But it is a huge file and we have to archive it frequently.
It can be quite a pain.
We
use log files for debugging and troubleshooting purposes. IP addresses
and access times are not linked to your email address or any other
personally identifiable information, but it still gves you that
creepy feeling of being watched, doesn't it?
Cookies
If
you request certain services from us, Radio Free Babylon™ may then
attempt to set cookies on your computer and later access those
cookies. You can normally refuse cookies by setting preferences
in your browser. You do not need to accept cookies in order to
use the Radio Free Babylon™ Services. But if you refuse cookies,
grandma will cry.A
cookie is a small amount of data, which often includes a unique
identifier that is sent to your browser from a Web site's computers
and then stored on your computer's hard drive. A cookie cannot
obtain information from your hard drive, destroy files, or transmit
viruses. We suggest milk with your cookies.
Each
Web site can send its own cookie to your browser, if your browser's
preferences allow it. To protect your privacy, your browser normally
only permits a Web site to access cookies that it has previously
sent to you, but not the cookies sent to you by other sites. That
is so confusing. Nevermind it.
Choices
About Cookies
You
can normally configure your browser to accept all cookies, reject
all cookies, or notify you when a cookie is set. (Each browser
is different, so check the "Help" menu of your browser
to learn how to change your cookie preferences.)
If
you reject all cookies, you will still be able to use the Radio Free Babylon™ Services.
Cookies
are used only as an option selected by you that allows us to recall
your email address from the cookie that we sent to your computer.
Data
Storage/User Information
All
Radio Free Babylon™ account information (including names, mailing
addresses) and content of email messages are stored on multiple
redundant disk storage systems. No removable offline copies or
backups are made. Seriously.
If
you request deletion of your email address or any other identifiable
information, your information will be deactivated and removed from
our user registration database within 30 days. But first we need
to make a copy of it and store it in a vault, that's why it takes
30 days.In
reviewing the information above, please keep in mind that Radio Free Babylon™ cannot and does not assume any responsibility for
any actions or omissions of third parties, including other Site
users, including the manner in which they might use information
received either from Radio Free Babylon™ or independently. In other
words, we are totally blameless in all things no matter what.
And
we're not even sure why we have all this stuff on here. We dont
wanna know who you are if you don't wanna be known. We aren't salesmen.
We hate salesmen. We won't intrude, and we don't expect you too
either. This is all CYA legal nonsense that absolves us somehow
if anything should ever go wrong We don't like it, but it's required
these days. Sorry. Stay sweet. Don't ever change. Have a great
summer.